A Kindergarten Year

Ecclesiastically speaking, I've had a bad year. But I've learned a few things--things, in a manner of speaking you are supposed to learn in Kindergarten. I just learned them decades late. Here are a few:

• I struggled with having no opportunity to use what I perceive as my gifts. I am now keenly aware of the times when the shoe was on the other foot, and I was telling people "just because you want to, doesn't mean you should." I still believe that is true, but having felt its sting I have much more sympathy for the difficulty it creates, and much more respect for those who handle it well.

• I've learned that it is almost impossible to be in the Word if you are not serving. Somehow. And once you are serving, the desire for the Word returns, regardless of the nature of the service, and regardless of whether it aligns with your "gifts."

• I've learned that if we are not careful we create guilt in brothers and sisters who do not have the gift of evangelism. We forget that we are a body of many parts and, as far gifts are concerned, there is not one called "evangelist" or "disciple-maker" that is expected of us all. Put differently, we project the corporate mission of the church onto a uniform requirement for individuals. Don't do that.

• I've always been OK with people not agreeing with me. But I've learned that I have to love people for whom it is important to be right, without feeling the need to point out that they mightn't be. If it is not a false Gospel they are proclaiming, I've learned not to care. I don't know if that is right.

• I've learned, once again, that blogging is good for me. It causes me to meditate. I can read the Word just to read the Word--and end up just reading the Word. But when I blog right, I look to the Word, deeper, to evaluate the consistency of my writing with scripture.  Blogging is often looked down upon. It shouldn't be painted with a broad brush. It can be one of the most contemplative of activities.

• I've learned that all of us champion certain practices and traditions from those who came before, be it the Puritans, the Reformers, or the early church. And that all of us ignore certain practices and traditions from those who can before, be it the Puritans, the Reformers, or the early church. As far as referring to history is concerned, we are cafeteria Christians.

• I've accepted a theological Occam's razor: the more complicated a doctrine is, the longer it takes to explain, and the more difficult it is to support with scripture, the more likely it contains error and the less likely it should be cardinal.

• I've learned that when you ask forgiveness, people say they forgive you but they don't forget. I question whether that is the best we can do as fallen men and women. I say that from both sides of that coin. It may be the most sobering lesson I learned all year.

• I've always been able to ask for forgiveness. It hasn't been a problem for me. But I now think that asking forgiveness of someone  that you think you haven't sinned against, just to smooth things out, is not productive at all.

• I've learned that Jesus said "My God, my God why have you forsaken me?" so that I don't have to. And when I do succumb to the temptation, I have to remind myself: Don't do that.